


300 miles from home

by defender13



Category: Women's Hockey RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-05
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-27 12:44:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13881129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defender13/pseuds/defender13
Summary: Marie is the new terrier and the big city intimidates her a little.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I love writing young Pou fics!  
> So, im finally posting one! 
> 
> Special thank you to RhiD29 for helping me with the french!

Looking out the window Marie anxiously bites at her thumb nail and she knows if she continues this way it'll be blistered and bleeding. She can feel her heartbeat thumping inside her rib cage and she absently wonders if her heart will burst. Just keep breathing, she reminded herself. 

 “Marie,” her mother pointed in awe at the large buildings in front of them. This  _is_ everything you have ever wanted. 

 “Wow.” Marie shared the same reaction as her mother and when she turned to look at her, she was already a puddle of tears.

 “Maman c’est bien.” Marie encouraged placing her hand on top of her mom’s shaking wrist.

 “We’re so proud Marie-Philip.”

 “Je t'aime maman.” Marie consoled her trembling mother while staring at the entrance in front of them.

 “Boston University,” her father piped up “my daughter is about to be washed of her culture.” Marie pinched him from the backseat. She knew he was joking but it still stung her, she remembers overhearing a conversation between her parents on that topic. Her father was expressing his fretfulness on Marie going to America. “She’s just a simple small-town girl.” Everyday since then she thought of the word simple. What an empty word? She thought. I want to be _extraordinary_.

 “Je n'oublierai jamais d'où je viens papa.” she responded and that was a firm promise.

 

\---

Marie is sitting alone in her new dorm. She just had to say goodbye to her parents and that’s the hardest thing that she’s had to do in a long time, Marie is not good at goodbyes. Before she had a chance to get emotional the door bursts open.

“Hi there,” the shorter brunette approached Marie, smiling. “I’m Anya.” She was holding a pillow in one hand and a suitcase in the other.

“Hi.” Marie stood up from her bed “I’m Marie-Philip Poulin.” Anya started laughing at this and Marie was perplexed. _What’s so funny?_

“That’s the most french name I have ever heard and yeah, I know who you are.” Anya continued to grin. “We have to do something about your long ass name though.” Marie continued to stare at Anya. _Are all Americans like this?_

“Just call me Marie.”

“Boring! We need something more original.” Anya threw her suitcase onto her bed, sitting down beside it. _Is she insulting me?_

“Uh…” Marie was beyond confused and feeling a little embarrassed, like she was missing something. Anya continued to mumble to herself until a lightbulb went off.

“Got it!” Anya jumped up excitedly “Pou.”

“Poo?” Marie cracked a little smile. _Who the hell is this girl?_

“Yeah! P-O-U.” Marie shook her head a little bit watching Anya unpack her suitcase and she had to admit that it was creative. _This is going to be some year alright_. A tinge of homesickness already punching her in the stomach.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation:  
> Maman c’est bien = Mom it's okay  
> Je t'aime maman = I love you mama  
> Je n'oublierai jamais d'où je viens papa = I will never forget papa


	2. Chapter 2

Marie woke up with a familiar burning in her chest, unable to breathe. She hardly sat up before the hot tears started streaming down her face, she feels like she’s choking. It’s been a week since she moved in and she’s starting to understand her surroundings more, but she misses home. She misses the back and forth banter with her brother, her mom’s homemade meals and her dads persistent encouragement. Hockey is the only thing keeping her here and simultaneously is the only thing making her happy. Marie reached over and grabbed her phone checking the time; 5:30AM. She needed to talk to someone and she needed to do it _now_. Marie got off of her bed softly, insuring that she didn’t wake up her teammate. Throwing her hoodie on she left her dorm room and headed for her favourite place, BU Beach.

 

\---

 

“Hello?” the voice sounded groggy and tired. Marie wants to say so much but she can’t find the words.

“Caro.” Marie croaked out lamely, taking a seat on the grassy hill.

“Marie,” Caroline cleared her throat. “Is everything alright?” _No, everything is not alright._

“I don’t know,” and that is the truth. Marie is lost in a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions and there is nothing she wants more than to be happy. “I think I’m homesick.”

“That’s normal. It happens to everybody when they travel far for school.” There has always been something about Caro’s voice that soothes Marie’s anxiety. She’s the lesbian mom that she never had. The thought almost made her laugh.

“Well, what if I’m not good enough to be playing hockey here.” the words left her mouth and it felt like she got punched in the stomach. She was surprised to hear Caroline laughing on the other line. “What’s so funny?” Marie asked feeling a little hurt.

“Listen to me, do you know any other eighteen year olds who won a gold medal for their nation?” Marie thought for a moment, which turned into minutes.

“No.”

“Exactly. Just remember Boston is lucky to have you.” Marie nearly winced at that. She hated when anyone ever put her in the spotlight. Maybe her dad was right when he said she was simple, maybe simple is nice. “And Marie, just think about how much you will develop there. When you feel like you can’t handle anything anymore, hockey will be there.” Marie let that sink in.

“Thank you Caro.” Marie exhaled, relieved that she could breathe again.  

“I have a game on Friday against the Blades, come see me and some of the girls.” Caroline offered. “I think it could really help you.”

“Okay, I’ll be there. Thank you Caro.”

“See you then.” Marie hung up and checked the time; 7:00 AM. It felt like maybe, just maybe, things were going to get easier and for the first time Marie started to see how beautiful Boston truly is.


	3. Stars v. Blades

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and finally, here is bells. 
> 
> Apologies if this is not great, school is a bitch right now.  
> Translations at the end

Those fucking Canadians. _What aren’t they good at?_ The game is over and The Stars had won 5-3 and saying that Kacey Bellamy was pissed is an understatement. Nonetheless Duggan is begging her to come out and have drinks with the team.

“Bells, you have to come.”

“If I come there is going to be a bar fight.” Kacey gritted her teeth as they walked out of the arena to Meghan’s car.

 “Oh c’mon Kacey,” Meghan rolled her eyes “don’t you want to see Chuey?”

 “Fine. But tell Chuey she can’t bring _any_ of her little friends.” Kacey exhaled running a hand through her hair.

 “You know I can’t say that.” Duggan spat while out throwing her bag into the backseat of her car.

 “Whatever.” Kacey added.

 

\---

 When they arrived the whole team was already there mingling and to Kacey’s dismay so was the entire Stars team. _Perfect_. Before Kacey could make her way to the girls she was nearly knocked to the ground.

 “Sorry!” The younger girl turned and tried to offer a hand, but she had none since both were holding beer.

 “Are you even old enough to be in here?” she sneered but honestly didn’t mean for it to come out like that. Whatever she said made the babyface flushed.

 “Um-”

 “What’s your name?” Kacey tried to compensate

 “Pou.” the girl smiled crookedly

 “Your parents named you _that_?” Kacey questioned which also seemed to come out with venom and the last thing she wanted to do was make some underager cry. To Kacey’s surprise she started to laugh.

 “No. My teammates, according to them my name is too long.” she said and Kacey could hear the strong accent. _Oh great._  

 “You play for the Stars?” Kacey took the time to inspect her, something about her was vaugely familiar. She was shorter than Kacey was but a hockey player for sure, I mean _look_ at those thighs. There was something about her smile that made Kacey feel flustered and she’s a little disgusted with herself. _Focus_.

 “No. BU.”

 “Oh, well I have to say I’m a little relieved.”

 “Why?” the girls face scrunching up in confusion

 “Cause now I don’t have to hate you.” Kacey grinned and had the audacity to take the other beer from Pou’s hand.

 “Marie-Philip Poulin.” She said softly not breaking the eye contact with Kacey

“What about her?” Kacey scoffed but before Marie could say anymore Kacey had put it together. _She_ , in fact, was Marie-Philip Poulin. “Ah, I do know you.” she added and everything made sense. Kacey met Marie for the first time at the 2009 World Championship, Marie had gotten two goals past her and was named MVP of the tournament at only _seventeen_ years old.  This also happens to be the Marie-Philip Poulin who won gold and scored BOTH goals in the gold medal game at the Vancouver 2010 Olympics. 

“Sorry.” Marie broke the eye contact and tried to move past Kacey, who caught her by the wrist.

 “I still don’t have to hate you.” Kacey offered and was surprised at how desperate it came out.

 “Okay.” Marie smiled, already looking a little buzzed. Somehow they found themselves beside Caroline Ouellette and Chuey who stopped dancing when they saw the pair standing there.

 “Marie. Soit prudent.” Caro said raising an eyebrow and Kacey wasn’t sure what it meant but knew it couldn’t have been nice because Julie slapped her in the arm.

 “Je ne suis pas un enfant.” Marie spoke calmly but Kacey could tell she was embarrassed. “It’s okay Caro.” she added. Caro turned to look at Kacey and if looks could _kill-_

“Good game tonight Bells!” Chuey interjected.

“You too Chu. I missed you.” Kacey smiled and leaned in to give Julie a hug. There was a brief moment of awkward silence before Julie and Caro moved back into the groove of dancing.

 “It was nice meeting you officially,” Marie started shifting nervously from side to side. “But I have a really early practice tomorrow.” Kacey nodded, she understood the student-athlete life.

 “Do you have a ride?”

 “It’s a close walk.” Marie assured placing her beer at the bar giving Kacey a smile before walking towards the exit.

 “Wait,” Kacey had to bump a couple to get to Marie who already managed to get out of the bar. The outside air hit Kacey in the face, cooling off her cheeks. “Want some company?”

 “For sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Soit prudent= Be careful  
> Je ne suis pas un enfant = I'm not a child


	4. City views

The walk back to Marie’s campus was quiet and felt too fast for Kacey’s liking. She watched Marie shove her hands into her BU windbreaker and shuffle around for something, which Kacey assumed was her student I.D. card.

“I’m still getting use to using these,” Marie said and she swiped her card into the front of her residence. Kacey could picture Marie standing out in the cold for ten minutes trying to figure out why the door wasn’t opening and she almost cracked a smile. Marie holds the door open and Kacey hesitates for a minute. Marie must have noticed her because she grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her inside. 

 

“Tour?” Marie smiled gently looking up at Kacey for a moment, who doesn’t  _ really _ need a tour because the truth is she’s been here, many times, for many different reasons. 

“Sure.” Kacey opted not to tell Marie that. They walked up a stairwell for what felt like an eternity. Kacey was already tried from the game and her ankle was burning, like it usually does. 

“Jesus Pou,” Kacey started exaggerating her breath “you didn’t tell me we were travelling to space.” and Kacey wasn’t expecting Marie to let out such a genuine laugh, but when she did kacey’s face became numb. 

“Shut up. We’re almost there.” Kacey dramatically started walking up on her hands and knees and when Marie glanced back at her she rolled her eyes. “Quite the hockey player.” Marie added and Kacey nearly slammed into her when she suddenly stopped at a door that clearly read;  **NO ACCESS** . 

“Um,” Kacey started “that is going to be locked and-” Marie hushed her and twisted the knob opening the door to another stairwell that leads to the roof. 

“If we get caught I’ll handle that.” Marie quickly sprinted to the top of the stairs and waited at the door, calling down “Are you coming or what?” 

“You could get in trouble.” Kacey was embarrassingly nervous and she could hear Marie laughing at her.

“Guess Canada wins, eh?” and before Marie could chirp her more, Kacey had found herself at the top of the stairs walking out onto the roof. You could see the whole city from up here, it was beautifully lit up. Marie grabbed Kacey by the wrist and dragged her to the edge of the building both carefully taking a seat on the edge. Kacey was scared shitless, but after a couple minutes she found herself calmed by the scenery around her.

“This-- this is beautiful Pou.” there’s something about Kacey’s raspy voice that makes Marie feel like she can’t catch her breath. 

“Thanks,” Marie smiled back while pushing the hair from her face “I found it.” and Kacey loved how achieved Marie sounded. 

“And here I was thinking you were some goody two shoes.” Kacey started chuckling but glanced to see Marie’s eyebrows scrunched up, she was confused. “It means-- well … I thought you were a good girl.” Kacey had no better way of explaining the phrase. When she turned to look at Marie her face was more red than she’s ever seen it.

“I am.” Marie said turning herself around to land on the pebbles. “BU can’t stop students from enjoying the city,” Marie itched her cheek aggressively “I’m not hurting anybody.” she started to walk back to the door. Kacey quickly swung around and caught up to her.

“Hey,” Kacey reached for her wrist but caught her hand instead “I didn’t mean it in an offensive way.” 

“I know,” Marie smiled softly “I’m just really cold.” and Kacey nodded, following Marie down the stairs.

 

\---

“This is me.” Marie had her hands shoved into her jean pockets and if Marie were the kind she would lean up and kiss her, but the thought of that alone makes Marie hot and embarrassed. Plus, they technically just met. She mentally kicked herself.

“Tonight was nice.” Actually, it was the most fun she has had in a long time and she only worries a little bit when she remembers she just spent the night with Marie-Philip Poulin. “I heard you have your game opener next week,” Kacey shifted nervously from side to side “I’ll see you there.” Kacey smiled and before Marie could run away with her burning hot face, Kacey pressed a kiss to her cheek. Hot, Marie is hot, both mentally and physically and she’s pretty sure her heart stopped beating too. 

“Sleep well Pou.” Kacey had such a smug look on her face and it made Marie even more hot. 

“Ok.” was all Marie could manage and she wanted to bang her head off a wall at how stupid she sounded. Getting back into her room Anya was sitting on her bed and when she analyzed Marie’s she had the same look Kacey did.

“Why’re you so flustered baby Pou?” 

Marie didn’t bother responding until she had jumped under her duvet for safety.

“Shut. Up.” 


	5. Homesick

Kacey could tell by the way Marie was skating in warmups that she was going to have a  _ good  _ game. Before the game Marie had given her extra jersey for Kacey to wear, so there she was, in Marie-Philip Poulin’s jersey sitting with all the BU fans. For a moment Kacey thought about how much shit Duggs is going to give her. Already rehearsing in her head what she would say.  _ We’re just friends _ . Kacey watched Marie skate up to the blueline for starting lineups, her hair falling perfectly against her cheeks and Kacey wondered how she did that.

 

Marie glanced up at her shyly smiling before she was punched by Anya. 

 

“Tell me that’s your bae.” She smiled evilly at Marie who was so caught off guard 

 

“My what?” Marie is starting to get really tired of all this lingo that she doesn’t understand. 

 

“Your girl.” 

 

“No!” Marie exclaimed loud enough for the girls at the end of the line to look at her. She felt her face get hotter by the second. 

 

“Okay champ.” Anya laughed and Marie had to laugh too, it was the closest thing she could do to express her embarrassment besides crying. 

 

Kacey assumed that her teammate was giving her a hard time because her face had gone red and she was shaking her head rapidly. There’s something about Marie getting flustered that gets Kacey going. 

 

Marie owned the game. Scoring three goals and assisting two. She had the fans cheering louder than Kacey has ever heard at a women’s college game. 

 

\---

 

“You played amazing, seriously.” Kacey gushed walking a little bit too fast for Marie to keep up with her hockey bag slung around her shoulder.

 

“It was a team effort.” Marie muttered shyly as she dumped her bag into the backseat of Kacey’s car.

 

“It’s okay to take some credit once in awhile Pou.” Kacey started the car and blasted the cold air, not because she was hot but because she knew Marie was hot and drenched in sweat. Kacey noticed that Marie stayed quiet the car ride back to her dorm. Marie had a look on her face that Kacey has never seen before. As they pulled in front of Marie’s residence Kacey reached over and gently touched her wrist.

“Marie, is everything alright?” Kacey wasn’t sure what to say and really wasn’t sure why she looked so distraught. She just played an incredible game and proved her skills to her team and coaches. 

 

“Yeah, sorry.” 

 

“Did I do something to upset you?” 

 

“Non-no. It’s me,” Marie started to stumble over her words feverishly. “I’m- just... homesick.” Marie refused to look at Kacey in the eyes and instead focused on the clock. 

 

“I know that feeling, I’m sorry.” And without asking anymore questions Kacey tugged Marie in by the neck for a hug. “Boston will become your home soon.” 

 

Marie didn’t respond because she was too distracted by the knot in her throat and the tears threatening to fall from her eyes. Instead, she pulled herself closer into Kacey. 

 

“You don’t have to portray yourself as this woman of steel either.” It was like Kacey knew by the sound of Marie’s breathing that she needed to cry and just like that, Marie was weeping into Kacey’s shoulder. “It’s- It’s okay Marie.” Kacey cooed while rubbing her back gently.

 

Never in a million years would Kacey think to be in this situation with any Canadian hockey player, let alone Marie-Philip Poulin. Kacey wants to slap herself when she wishes that they’d stay like this all night. There was something about Marie pressing into her that made her heart pound. We are  _ just  _ friends, or at least that’s what she keeps telling herself. 

 

“Why don’t you come stay at my place tonight?” Even asking the question made Kacey anxious, but in a good way. Besides, it is something friends would offer. 

 

“I have an early dryland tomorrow.” Marie released herself from the hug and wiped at her flushed cheeks. 

 

“I can drive you back in the morning, plus I make a freakishly good tea and I think that’s what you need right now.” 


	6. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bare with me.... I know this isn't great

Marie kicked her shoes off at the front door and followed Kacey into her apartment. It was bigger than Marie thought it would be. Kacey directed her into the kitchen motioning for her to sit down at the island. 

 

“Make yourself at home.” Kacey caught Marie’s eyes for a moment and gave her a look that made Marie really believe what she said.

“Thank you,” Marie sat down at the bar stool and readjusted her ball cap nervously.  “I hope this isn’t rude to ask but do you think I could use your shower?” 

 

“No, of course! If you take a right it’s the first door,” Kacey reassured her with a warm smile “All the towels on the rack are clean.” 

 

“Thanks Kace.” Marie hopped off the stool and left the room, leaving Kacey with a hot face.

 

_ Kace... she likes that.  _

 

\---

 

When Marie came back into the kitchen she was consumed by the smell of burning. What the fu-

 

“Um,” Kacey turned around and faced Marie “So I tried to cook one of those frozen pizzas, but it kind of… didn’t turn out.” Marie wanted to chirp her but Kacey had just given her a place to crash so she opted not to. 

 

“I can cook-- I mean if you want me to… I use to with my family.” 

 

“That’s perfect,” Kacey grinned widely “I’ll make the tea that I promised.” 

 

\---

 

“It’s almost done-” Marie started but got interrupted by Kacey shoving a mug in front of her face.

 

“The tea is done.” Kacey looked excited and she took a step back so that Marie could turn around and take the mug from her. “Tell me what you think.” 

 

“Okay.” Marie felt nervous that Kacey was watching her, but she pressed the cup to her lips and allowed the warm fluid into her mouth. It tasted like christmas and made Marie feel like she was at home again with her brother and parents. There was a burning in her chest that came after and Marie realized it wasn’t  _ just _ tea. 

 

“Is there whisky in this?” Marie started to cough and Kacey laughed loudly. The last time Marie drank whisky it was on senior prom night and she had stolen it from her parent’s cabinet, but then later confessed because the guilt was eating her up. 

 

“That’s my secret ingredient. Shhh, don’t tell.” Kacey held her finger up to Marie’s lips. There was a moment where everything stopped and it was just the two of them, but Marie broke it to take the pot off of the stove. 

 

“Well it’s really good.” Marie started to separate the food into both of their dishes. “Also, grab a bowl, it’s done.”  

 

\---

 

“Pou, that was seriously good.” Kacey repeated for about the tenth time while turning on the TV in the living room. 

 

“So was your tea.” Marie took a seat on the small couch beside Kacey, feeling a little buzzed.

 

“What do you want to watch?” Kacey played around with the channels until she gave up and put on the NHL hockey game, Boston vs. Montreal.

 

“Boston’s going to lose, they suck.” Marie didn’t even hesitate and Kacey dramatically put a hand to her heart like she was offended.

 

“Whatever, Canada.” Kacey grinned reaching over to pinch Marie’s arm. “You’re just upset because Americans do it better.” 

 

“Whatever makes you sleep at night, Boston.” Marie went to pinch her back but Kacey grabbed her by the wrist and pulled Marie towards her. 

 

“Play nice Pou.” Kacey teased but didn’t break the eye contact between them. Kacey took the time to analyze Marie’s face. Her cheekbones were always peky and flushed and her resting face always looked like a contempt smile, Kacey loved that about her. She loved that Marie gets flushed over the simplest things and that sometimes she needs help finishing her sentences because that is what makes her who she is. 

 

“Okay.” was all Marie could gather. If Kacey really wanted to she could move closer and kiss Marie, but Kacey knows Marie just needs a friend right now. Instead, Kacey pulls her into a hug and all of Marie ends up flopping on top of Kacey. It was kind of an awkward position because Marie’s legs were too long and hung off the edge of the couch, her head nestling into Kacey’s shoulder.

 

“You’re like a puppy,” Kacey joked taking the elastic out of Marie’s hair. “I invited you in and now I’m watering, pampering and feeding you.” 

 

“Let’s get it right,” Marie lifted her head from the pit of Kacey’s shoulder “ _ I fed you _ .” Kacey laughed and continued to play with Marie’s mildly wet hair. 

 

“Okay, okay that’s a fair point.” Marie relaxed into Kacey again but this time Kacey could hear that Marie was breathing different, softer. When she looked down she saw Marie nestled into her, still laying on top, with her legs hanging off the side of the couch, fast asleep.


	7. I told you not to come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pls forgive me for this MESS

Marie’s alarm woke her within seconds and she quickly jumped off the couch when she realized Kacey wasn’t underneath her anymore. She walked into the kitchen and to her surprise someone was putting groceries away with Kacey. 

“I told you not to come today.” Kacey grumbled and closed the fridge angrily which revealed Marie standing shyly. “Hey, I was just about to wake you. How did you sleep?” Kacey stepped closer and Marie looked back at the person behind Kacey was none other than Meghan Duggan. 

“Hey  _ kid _ .” Duggs smirked from behind Kacey. Kacey knew the way Meghan behaved when she had other girls around and despised it because she would do nothing but heckle them. 

“Oh, hi.” Marie wiped at her tired eyes, almost hoping that she was having a bad nightmare. “I woke up and you weren’t there so I just came to see where you were.” Marie felt equally embarrassed and horrified because she should have known that someone like Kacey Bellamy would have a girlfriend. “I’m sorry-- I didn’t know. I should go.” 

“Woah- slow down. You didn’t know what? And where are you going?” Kacey looked worried and Marie was confused as to why Meghan doesn’t look like she is about to kill her. 

“I didn’t know you two were  _ together _ .” Marie spoke too fast and the english she was speaking was messy, she knew it. She reconsidered repeating herself until Meghan let out a deafening laugh that nearly shook the room along with Kacey. Marie looked down at her feet and refused to make eye contact. 

“If I had to date Megs I would have already ripped all my hair out.” Kacey shared a smile with Meghan who was still laughing behind her cup of coffee. 

“Bells is like my younger sister,” Meghan assured “But If you hurt her then we have a problem.” 

Now Marie felt like an even bigger idiot. 

“Oh,” Marie wished that her face would stop getting hot. “Well, thanks for having me but I have a dryland with the team so I have to go.” 

“Want me to drive you?” 

“No-- I’m just going to walk off my embarrassment.” Marie didn’t mean for it to be funny but Kacey and Meghan were laughing again.  _ Americans are weird. _

“Text me when it’s over and maybe we can go for coffee?” 

“For sure,” Marie had her bag slung around her shoulder “Um sorry again.” She said quietly closing the door behind her. 

Meghan and Kacey were left alone in the kitchen and they exchanged looks. Meghan quirked an eyebrow 

“Guess Gill didn’t tell her.” Meghan concluded as she poured herself a glass of water. 


	8. Chapter 8

Boston was chilly and Marie walked through the park thinking about how the past two months with Kacey have helped her in ways she had never expected. Kacey’s couch was Marie’s favorite place to sleep. 

Homesick?  _ Kacey _ . Hungry?  _ Kacey _ . Frustrated? _ Kacey _ . 

 

There was a fleeting rush of worry, she _really_ shouldn't be relying on someone like this, but it’s okay because we are just _friends._

 

Sometimes when Marie’s a little buzzed after drinking Kacey’s favorite beer and having a movie marathon, she feels like she could just reach out, grab her hand and intertwine it with her own-- but that’s not what friends do. 

 

**Marie: almost there**

 

**Bells: ok! I have something to give ya… see you soon.**

 

Marie pushed her phone back down in her pocket and snickered at all the odd emojis Kacey makes sure to string along with her texts. Marie didn’t know the meaning of them but loved that Kacey used them in her own way. 

 

When Marie got to Kacey’s door she knocked and then shoved her hand into her pocket so Kacey couldn’t see her handshake. Kacey opened the door and smiled widely.

 

Marie tried to tell her heart to stop thumping like that. 

 

“How was practice?” Kacey offered and opened the door fully, Marie following her into the kitchen. 

 

“Eh, It was okay.” Marie shrugged indifferently. Kacey whipped around and gave her a look of uncertainty as Marie sat down at the island.

 

“You always love practice. What happened?”

 

“I don’t know, I just feel so much pressure to be perfect and I just got the call today… I got invited to camp in December.” 

“Marie that’s amazing news!” Kacey wrapped Marie in a genuine hug. The scent of Kacey made her weak.

“Added pressure I guess.” Marie pulled back and started to chew on her thumbnail, she was doing it again. The anxiety crept up on her like a shadow in the night and she didn’t expect it. Her chest started to seize.

She can’t breathe.

She got up from her chair and without saying anything went into the washroom and wrapped herself around the toilet bowl. She turned on the tap so that Kacey wouldn’t hear her heavy breath. 

Kacey knocked.

“Marie is everything ok?” 

Marie tried to respond but she couldn’t, she felt like she was going to throw up. How did this happen? She was perfectly fine a few minutes ago.  _ What the hell is wrong with me? _

Kacey twisted at the knob and came in, gently placing a hand on the back of Marie’s neck.

“Are you sick?” Kacey said in a hushed tone, pulling Marie’s hair back into a bun. Marie didn’t have an answer for her because she didn’t know what was wrong herself. All she knew is that she never use to feel this way around Kacey, she always felt like she was at home. Maybe the talk of World Championships is what made her feel nauseous, even though it was months away. “It’s okay, just breathe.” Kacey rubbed circles against Marie’s back. 

“What the fuck is wrong with me.” Marie gagged and dunked her head further into the toilet letting the bile evacuate her body. She was now sobbing. 

_ Kacey must think I’m pathetic. _

“I think you’re having an anxiety attack.” Kacey kept rubbing circles and massaging the back of Marie’s neck. “Just breathe Marie.” Kacey guided her and after several minutes Marie had calmed down and taken her head out of the toilet, resting her head up against the nearest wall allowing herself to close her eyes and focus on her breathing. 

“Come with me.” Kacey stood up and reached down for Marie to take hold of her hand. She didn’t.

“I should go back to campus.” Marie wiped at her eyes furiously-- she was embarrassed. 

“Marie, come,” Kacey said sternly and Marie unraveled herself, taking Kacey’s hand. Instead of letting go of her hand after getting to her feet Kacey intertwined their fingers and Marie didn’t even notice till they were in her bedroom. Kacey opened her bottom drawer and pulled out an old pair of UNH sweatpants and a US hockey sweatshirt. 

“Change into these,” Kacey said handing her the clothes. “I’m going to grab you a water bottle.” 

By the time Kacey got back, Marie was just pulling the sweatshirt over her head. 

“Lie down Pou,” Kacey instructed softly, scooting onto the bed beside her. Kacey handed Marie the water bottle and she gulped the liquid feverishly. 

“Sorry, Kace.” Marie refused to make eye contact with her, instead, she looked straight ahead at the US flag perched on the wall. 

“You have nothing to apologize for, I use to go through the exact same thing.” Kacey turned and looked at Marie, and she really analyzed her. The little-unnoticed beauty mark on her face. She looks tired, there were bags under her eyes and her normally smiling face was stoic. 

“Glad it's not just me.”

“It happens to the best of us.” Kacey didn’t take her eyes off of her, instead, she wrapped her arm around Marie's shoulders and Marie wordlessly turned and edged closer into Kacey's shoulder her hand resting on Kacey’s hip. 

“Yeah.”  

“I really care about you,” Kacey started to rub circles against Marie’s back. “And I hate seeing you like this.” 


	9. Chapter 9

Marie had just finished her dryland and she was exhausted and some embarrassment still lingered from yesterday. 

“Hey baby face,” Ward patted Marie on the back while they entered the change room “you’re quite the grinder.” 

 

“Thank you.” Marie couldn’t help but blush feverishly. She always gets like this when she is complimented. 

“Of course kid, I’m sure I’ll see you at camp in December.” Marie watched her untie her shoes and switch out her socks for a fresh pair.

 

“That’s the goal.” Marie stumbled over her words and blushed harder. The conversation ended and she located her locker to strip out of her sweaty clothes.  _ God, I need a shower.  _

 

***

 

Marie was the last one to leave the showers and get changed. She sported a BU hoodie and beanie. Unfortunately, she forgot her pants which meant she had to wear her workout shorts. It didn’t bother her that much because her dorm was a close walk. Marie walked out of the building and towards her building. 

 

She felt comfort when she finally reached her front door. When she opened the door she heard casual conversation coming from the bedroom.  

 

“She should be back soon, she’s usually the last to leave.”

 

“Oh, okay, no worries.” 

 

Marie was shocked when she saw Kacey sitting on her bed and Anya nonchalantly sitting in their shared bean bag chair. 

 

“Hi.” Marie smiled. 

 

“Hi.” Kacey exchanged the same smile but before Marie could say anymore-

 

“Pou!” Anya interrupted the stare between the two “what is with the shorts?” 

 

Marie’s face went red realizing how ridiculous she must look right now. Without saying anything she went to her closet and pulled out a pair of sweatpants. 

 

“I forgot extra pants” Marie explained when she exited the washroom. 

 

“Ha. You’re too easy to embarrass Pou.” Anya got up from the chair and grabbed her backpack. “Anyways, I have to go study for this midterm. See ya.” She shut the door loudly and it set Marie back into reality. 

 

Marie turned back to look at Kacey who was still seated on her bed comfortably. 

 

“Everything okay?” Marie made her way over to the bed. 

 

“Yup,” Kacey smiled widely “just wanted to make sure that you recovered from yesterday.” Marie nodded.

 

“I am really sore though,” Marie gestured to her shoulders. Kacey pulled her in quickly and started to tickle her.

“Ow!” Marie gasped out between her bursts of laughter. Marie was bigger than Kacey and used her strength to wriggle off the bed and fall to the floor. “That hurt!” Marie huffed and gave Kacey a pouty face. 

“Really? C’mere.” Kacey put one of her hands on Marie’s back and started to rub slow circles gently. 

“Nice transition,” Marie looked up from the pillow “asshole.”

Kacey quickly recoiled her hand and made a pouty face. 

“Not fair!” Marie shouted, grabbing her and pulling her beside Marie on the ground. 

“Do you have anything to say to me?” Kacey pouted harder.

Marie got silent and didn’t say anything because her heart started thumping heavily and she couldn't control it. 

“I’m glad I have you.” Marie blushed before she could even finish her sentence, but she didn’t feel as bad because Kacey’s cheeks had gone bright pink as well. 

“Wanna watch a movie?” Kacey smiled and the pair had no choice but to squish together on Marie’s small mattress. 

“No scary movies and it’s a deal,” Marie added 


End file.
